My body image concerns started at a young age when I struggled with acne, but my lack of confidence began way before this. I remember a friend of mine in grade school making some off-handed comment about a generic Yankees baseball cap I was wearing and I felt self-conscious for months. I felt the same […]
Laser Treatments for facial scars – Do they work?
I have talked a lot about my facial scars on this blog. I blame them for the resurgence of my BDD and I also blame them for the inescapable nature of the beast. I blame them for my ugliness and my shame I blame them for my fear of face to face casual conversation. Something I […]
Internal Bleeding
I bleed from the inside My organs fill up and choke, suffocated by blood, starving for oxygen. Now it threatens to overtake my mind. Each vessel leaks its own toxic mix of blood and bile. When you bleed from the inside you bleed alone. There is no bandage to help stop the bleeding I try […]
Change is Going to Come
Here is something that may not surprise you. Things don’t change on their own, you have to change with them, or maybe more like – you have to change for them… to change that is. 6 weeks into our around the world adventure and I found myself slipping into the doldrums of self-hate and isolation. […]
From the road
I shouldn’t have taken the Ambien… It never leads to a good night’s sleep. 30 days on the road and I am left with a feeling of emptiness, something must be wrong, everything seems wrong. But that is because I hate myself. I cannot stand the way I look in the mirror. No matter what […]
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