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Overcoming Body Dysmorphic Disorder - My Story of Living With BDD

"It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see."
~ Henry David Thoreau

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This is the Story of My Life Living With Body Dysmorphic Disorder

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A Book That Will Change Your Life and Help You Overcome Your BDD

July 20, 2014 By Stephen

Hap-Trap-Front-Cover-300dpi-2Sept10Maybe you are like me.

You are on your 100’th self-help book and you are sure this one is the one that is going to make the difference.

You have once again been sold a bill of goods that you control your thoughts, and that the way to beat depression or to overcome your BDD is to simply change your thoughts.

News Flash, You Cannot Control Your Thoughts!

This was news to me.

I can control many things in my life:

  • I can control what clothes I put on in the morning
  • I can control what I put in my mouth each day
  • I can control my exercise routine
  • I can control my children (NOT!)

Commonplace notions of happiness are misleading, inaccurate, and can actually make you miserable.

For example, positive thinking often does NOT work — and research shows that positive affirmations make many people feel worse!

WTF!

[easyazon_link identifier=”B004TGFE3O” locale=”US” tag=”4hourlife00-20″]The happiness trap[/easyazon_link] is based on (for me at least) a new type of training.

We all like to feel good, but desperately trying to avoid painful feelings dooms us to failure.

The author describes four myths that make up the happiness trap:

Four Myths:

Myth 1: Happiness is the natural state for human beings – Our culture insists that humans are naturally happy. Yet, the scary statistics regarding mental illness (1 in 10  has clinical depression, 1 in 5 is depressed at some time, 1 in 4 has or has had an addiction, 30 percent of the adult population has a recognized psychological disorder and of all those people you know almost half of these will seriously contemplate suicide at some point… and 1 in 10 will actually attempt it) tell another story.

Myth 2: If you’re not happy your defective – Our society tends to assume that psychological suffering is abnormal: a sign of a weakness or illness and a mind that is Faulty or defective.

Myth 3: To create a better life, we must get rid of negative feelings – The current trend of a “feel-good” society tells us to ELIMINATE negative feelings and ACCUMULATE the “positive.”

Myth 4: You should be able to control what you think and feel – Many current self-help programs subscribe to this myth by REPLACING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS WITH POSITIVE ONES.

These 4 basic thoughts set us up for a battle we can never win.

Acceptance and Commitment Training (ACT)

Act is based on two main principles:

  1. Mindfulness
  2. Values

1. Mindfulness is a special mental state of AWARENESS and OPENNESS. Mindfulness involves three skills.

  1. Skill 1: Diffusion – When you learn to defuse painful and unpleasant thoughts, self-limiting belief s and self-criticism, they have less influence on you.
  2. Skill 2: Expansion – This means making room for painful thoughts and feelings and allowing them to flow through you, without getting swept away by them.
  3. Skill 3: Connection – This means living fully in the present instead of dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.

2. Values are your heart’s deepest desires for how you want to behave as a human being; what you want to STAND FOR in life.

  • In ACT, you use values to give life MEANING, PURPOSE, and DIRECTION.
  • You translate values into COMMITTED ACTION: you do what really matters to you.

Why this book helps with Body Dysmorphic Disorder

You may be asking what this all has to do with overcoming BDD.

I certainly didn’t buy this book with this goal in mind, I heard about it in passing and was lucky enough to download a copy.

BDD is all about fantasies and fairytales that have developed in our mind.

These fairytales can be based on expectations we may have or stories that we have made up about ourselves.

For me they are about the way I look and the way people perceive me.

They are stories of how these perceptions of others will affect the outcome of my life.

They hold me back, they stop me from pursuing a rich and meaningful life, they hurt my wife and children.

They are useless.

As hard as I have tried to put them aside I cannot, the thoughts are here to stay.

This book is teaching me how these thoughts, these “fairytales” are simply stories. They hold no real truth, they are simply made up fairy tales, and how to diffuse these hurtful stories is the key to understanding and overcoming BDD.

And for that reason this may be the very best book ever written on the subject.

Even though it was never meant to be.

The Happiness Trap

You can download and read the book [easyazon_link asin=”1590305841″ locale=”US” new_window=”default” nofollow=”default” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ add_to_cart=”default” cloaking=”default” localization=”default” popups=”default”]The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living: A Guide to ACT[/easyazon_link] or check out the author’s website. I have also recently purchased the [easyazon_link asin=”1611801575″ locale=”US” new_window=”default” nofollow=”default” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ add_to_cart=”default” cloaking=”default” localization=”default” popups=”default”]The Illustrated Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living[/easyazon_link] and I really like it. The cartoons are a great summary of the book and I plan on sharing it with my children.

Filed Under: Books, Literature, Overcoming Body Dysmorphic Disorder Tagged With: Acceptance, ACT, Books, Happiness, Philosophy, Reading

Serotonin-Reuptake Inhibitors in the Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD)

August 1, 2013 By Stephen

Most commonly used serotonin-reuptake inhibitors used in the treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) and the average effective dosages based on clinical studies:

You can read more about augmenting SSRI’s in the treatment of BDD if a single agent is not effective.

Generic Name Brand Name Average Dose (milligrams per day)*
Citalopram Celexa 66
Escitalopram Lexapro 29
Fluoxetine Prozac 67
Fluvoxamine Luvox 308
Paraxetine Paxil 55
Setraline Zoloft 202
Clomipramine Anafranil 203

How to dose an SSRI in BDD

There’s no one-size-fits-all formula; dosing will depend on a number of factors. The most tolerable dosing strategy is to start with a low dose and gradually increase the dose while monitoring for side effects.

So, for example, if you try escitalopram (Lexapro), the usual starting dose is 10 mg a day. After 2 weeks or so, assuming you’re tolerating it well, you could raise it to 20 mg a day. After 2 to 3 weeks on 20 mg a day, you could then raise it to 30 mg a day, unless you’re already starting to improve or are having problematic side effects.

For fluoxetine (Prozac), the usual starting dose is 20 mg per day. After taking this dose for 2 weeks or so you could raise the dose to 40 mg a day. After another 2 to 3 weeks you could raise it to 60 mg/day, and then raise it to 80 mg a day after another 2 to 3 weeks, unless you’re getting better on a lower dose or are having trouble with side effects. But these dosing schedules are only general guidelines.

Generally, I recommend raising the dose more quickly for people who are severely ill and are tolerating the medicine well. Patients who are closely monitored during hospitalization can also have their dose raised more quickly than described above.

Conversely, it makes sense to raise the dose more slowly if you start substantially improving on a lower dose (because you may not need to raise it further) or if you’re having trouble with side effects. Your preference also matters.

A reasonable goal, however, is to reach the maximum dose that the manufacturer recommends (if a lower dose isn’t already working) within 4 to 9 weeks of starting the medicine.

Don’t give up on an SRI until you’ve tried it for at least 12 to 16 weeks, while reaching a high enough dose during that time

To see if a particular SRI will work for you, it’s important to try it for a total of at least 12 to 16 weeks, while reaching a high dose if possible (unless a lower dose works for you) for at least 3 of those weeks. This is called an “adequate” trial. The trial is considered “inadequate” if you don’t reach a high enough dose or if you try the medicine for less than a total of 3 months. An inadequate trial may not be sufficient to successfully treat BDD.

Studies indicate that the vast majority (nearly 90%) of SRI treatments that people with BDD receive aren’t optimal (reaching the highest dose) for this disorder. And two-thirds of SRI treatments that are received aren’t even minimally adequate for BDD.

You need to take the medicine every day as prescribed

It’s very important to take the medication every day, exactly as prescribed, even if it doesn’t seem to be helping. If you take less than prescribed, or you take it sporadically, it may not work as well or at all. If you have trouble remembering to take it every day, try using a pill box (which you can buy at a pharmacy), setting an alarm, or finding another way to remember. If you don’t want to take the medicine as prescribed because of side effects or because you have concerns about it, it’s better to discuss your concerns with your doctor, rather than stopping the medicine or not taking it as prescribed.

Try to be patient; SRIs usually begin to work gradually

Occasionally, the medication begins to work suddenly. Some people can pinpoint the day, or even the hour, that it starts working. But typically, it starts working gradually. People say things like “I felt a little better three days ago and today, but not for very long, so I don’t know if it’s really working.” Don’t get discouraged if the medicine takes a while to work and you get off to a slow start. With more time on the medicine, these brief intermittent spurts of improvement gradually develop into more sustained periods of well-being. Good hours gradually turn into entire good days. Good days then become good weeks, months, and years.

If you improve with an SRI, you’re likely to continue to feel well for as long as you take it

In my clinical experience, the vast majority of people who improve with an SRI continue to feel well over months and even years while taking the medication. Some patients I’ve treated have done well on the medication for more than a decade. In fact, many people say that the longer they take the SRI, the better they feel. I’ve found that about 40% of people who improve with an SRI in the first 3 months of treatment continue to improve even more over the next 6 months. I’ve also found that fewer than 10% of people who respond to an SRI experience a full return of their BDD symptoms while continuing to take the SRI.

Continue an effective SRI for a year or two, or even longer

Clinical guidelines recommend staying on an effective SRI for at least a year or two, even if you’re feeling better. You may want to stay on it longer than that, especially if you’ve tried stopping an SRI in the past and your symptoms returned, or if your BDD has been severe. A year or more of decreased symptoms can allow you to get back to work or do your job more effectively, socialize more, and start enjoying your life.

If you decide to stop an effective SRI, plan this carefully with your doctor

There’s no way to predict whether your symptoms will return if you stop an SRI. Some people assume that if they’ve had CBT while taking an SRI that they can safely stop the SRI, but this shouldn’t be assumed to be true; this, too, can’t be predicted, and your symptoms could return.

What to do about side effects, if they occur

Like all medications, the SRIs have the potential to cause side effects. In general, however, the SRIs are well tolerated. If side effects occur, they’re often quite minimal, and they may improve or disappear on their own with the passage of time. Most people have no side effects or fairly minimal and tolerable ones. Side effects are most likely to occur early in treatment (for example, within the first few weeks). This can be frustrating, because often the medicine hasn’t had a chance to work yet. It helps to be patient! But with more time, they may disappear. Side effects are also more likely to occur when the dose is raised.

Nonetheless, side effects can occur. Some of the more common ones are nausea, insomnia, feeling jittery, fatigue, sweating, decreased appetite, and decreased sex drive and sexual functioning (although sometimes sex drive and functioning improve with an SRI because people are no longer as depressed or self-conscious about their body). Clomipramine (Anafranil) can cause dry mouth and constipation. These side effects are tolerable for many people, and they go away after stopping the medication. None of the SRIs have life-threatening side effects. People with BDD who experience side effects are often willing to tolerate them because they so appreciate the symptom relief they obtain.

When side effects do occur, they can often be reduced. Here are a few possible approaches that you and your doctor can consider:

  1. Keep taking the medicine and wait: Often, side effects diminish or disappear simply with the passage of time, as your body adjusts to the medicine.
  2. Change the time the medicine is taken: Certain side effects may improve by doing this. For example, if an SRI makes you tired (which is pretty uncommon), this side effect may go away—and possibly improve your sleep—if you take it at bedtime instead of in the morning.
  3. Slow down the rate at which the dose is being raised: If your doctor is in the process of trying to raise your dose to get it high enough to work, one alternative is to slow down the rate at which the dose is being increased. This will give your body more time to adjust to the medicine. If and when the side effects become more tolerable, you can try raising the dose again.
  4. Lower the dose: If side effects are more problematic and not tolerable on the current dose, your doctor can slowly decrease the dose (while watching carefully for worsening of BDD or depressive symptoms) to see if side effects disappear. If they do, an attempt can then be made to increase the dose again if BDD symptoms are still present.
  5. Add other medications to try to counteract side effects: There are many potentially helpful options, depending on the side effect you’re experiencing.
  6. Try other options: Depending on the side effect, there are other options that may help. For example, if the medicine makes you feel jittery, lowering caffeine intake may help. Of if it causes some nausea, it may help to take the medicine with some food. Often, such strategies are helpful. If they aren’t, you and your doctor can consider trying another SRI. You may tolerate one better than another.
An important reminder:

Be sure your doctor knows you have BDD. Don’t just tell him or her that you have just depression or anxiety. A common clinical error is to focus treatment on depression rather than BDD. This often leads to use of an antidepressant other than an SRI, too brief an SRI trial, or an SRI dose that’s too low for BDD. In such cases, BDD (and the depression) may not improve. An effective medication regimen for depression won’t necessarily effectively treat BDD. However, an effective medication regimen for BDD will often effectively treat depression, whether or not the depression is due to BDD.

Post based on text by: Phillips, Katharine A. (2009-01-12). Understanding Body Dysmorphic Disorder Oxford University Press. 

Filed Under: Overcoming Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) Tagged With: Average Dose, BDD, Body, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Brand, Brand Name, Dosage, Efficacy, Generic, Generic Name, Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitor, SNRI, SRI, SSRI, Studies, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD)

Body Dysmorphic Disorder – Cognitive Behavioral Therapy – Exposure Worksheet

November 4, 2012 By Stephen

Here is the exposure worksheet I adapted from Feeling Good about the Way You Look: A Program for Overcoming Body Image Problems.

I have included an example of a completed CBT exposure worksheet below as well.

I hope to complete some of these exercises on line over the next several weeks. If you happen upon this post feel free to do one of these exposure worksheets with me in the comments section. I will be happy to help.

Exposure Worksheet – Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for BDD

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Completed Exposure Worksheet Sample – Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for BDD

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I you haven’t already, please read and follow the guidelines from Feeling Good about the Way You Look: A Program for Overcoming Body Image Problems.

It is an amazing book that I recommend along with counseling. It may work well alone if you are highly motivated and organized!

 

Filed Under: Feeling Good About The Way You Look, Overcoming Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) Tagged With: BDD, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, CBT Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Exposure, Therapy, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), Worksheet

The Best Books for Treating and Understanding Body Dysmorphic Disorder

November 3, 2012 By Stephen

Here is my list of the best books on the subject of Body Dysmorphic Disorder.  There is other literature which focuses more on the topic of body image that I will discuss in a later post.

My Favorites

[easyazon_link asin=”0195379403″ locale=”US” new_window=”default” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ add_to_cart=”no” cloaking=”default” localization=”default” nofollow=”default” popups=”default”]Understanding Body Dysmorphic Disorder[/easyazon_link]by Katherine Phillips, M.D.

[easyazon_image add_to_cart=”no” align=”left” asin=”0195379403″ cloaking=”default” height=”160″ localization=”default” locale=”US” nofollow=”default” new_window=”default” src=”http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41EPnEUr9pL._SL160_.jpg” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ width=”112″]A Wonderful, concise and essential book to understand the diagnosis and treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder. It is a fairly short and easy read, that is full of top-notch information!Material is complete and presented in an organized and useful way. The understanding enabled for both client and therapist is one of the main traits of this book. And the author is obviously committed to the betterment/healing of her clients
[easyazon_link asin=”1572307307″ locale=”US” new_window=”default” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ add_to_cart=”no” cloaking=”default” localization=”default” nofollow=”default” popups=”default”]Feeling Good about the Way You Look: A Program for Overcoming Body Image Problems[/easyazon_link] by Sabine Wilhelm, Ph.D.

[easyazon_image add_to_cart=”no” align=”left” asin=”1572307307″ cloaking=”default” height=”160″ localization=”default” locale=”US” nofollow=”default” new_window=”default” src=”http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51FiFo3cq0L._SL160_.jpg” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ width=”107″]This is a wonderful book!  Written by the Director of the MGH OCD and Related Disorders Program, and Founder of the Body Dysmorphic Disorder Clinic, this book offers individuals suffering from Body Dysmorphic Disorder with critical tools to understand BDD and to bring their disorder under control.

The step by step approach detailed in the book is exactly what is needed for patients and clinicians alike. I have enthusiastically been recommending it to all of my clients who have BDD, and to colleagues interested in learning more about it. This book offers new hope to the millions of people worldwide who live with this troubling, but treatable disorder.

[easyazon_link asin=”1572242930″ locale=”US” new_window=”default” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ add_to_cart=”no” cloaking=”default” localization=”default” nofollow=”default” popups=”default”]The BDD Workbook: Overcome Body Dysmorphic Disorder and End Body Image Obsessions[/easyazon_link] by James Claiborn, Ph.D. and Cherry Pedrick, R.N.

[easyazon_image add_to_cart=”no” align=”left” asin=”1572242930″ cloaking=”default” height=”160″ localization=”default” locale=”US” nofollow=”default” new_window=”default” src=”http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/417CIWn0qSL._SL160_.jpg” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ width=”124″]This workbook really delves into the thought processes of a person who suffers from this exhausting illness. The worksheets and exercises really cause you to challenge the beliefs which have been engrained in your memory for decades.I would highly recommend this workbook for anyone who is self directed and able to work through the exercises on their own.
[easyazon_link asin=”0195167198″ locale=”US” new_window=”default” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ add_to_cart=”no” cloaking=”default” localization=”default” nofollow=”default” popups=”default”]The Broken Mirror: Understanding and Treating Body Dysmorphic Disorder[/easyazon_link] by Katherine Phillips, M.D.

[easyazon_image add_to_cart=”no” align=”left” asin=”0195167198″ cloaking=”default” height=”160″ localization=”default” locale=”US” nofollow=”default” new_window=”default” src=”http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/417CpMIe55L._SL160_.jpg” tag=”4hourlife00-20″ width=”100″]KatherinePhillips other book “Understanding Body Dysmorphic Disorder” is a more concise and consolidated read, it is also newer.But, if you want a more in-depth look into BDD and it’s treatment by the worlds leading expert, then “The Broken Mirror” is a must read. Probably still considered the gold standard.

Filed Under: Literature, Overcoming Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) Tagged With: BDD, Body, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Books, Image, Katherine Phillips, Literature, Reading, The Best of, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD)

Cognitive-Behavioral Strategies for Improving Insight in Body Dysmorphic Disorder

November 2, 2012 By Stephen

Here are several cognitive-behavioral strategies that are described by the San Francisco Bay Area Center for Cognitive Therapy to improve insight into your BDD

Self-Monitoring

I ask the individual to monitor how his BDD symptoms vary over time. Every hour he rates (0-10) how strongly he believes, for example, that his nose is too large. He also notes what was happening at the time and how he was feeling. We then plot on graph paper the strength of the person’s belief, where 10 is “my nose is too large” and 0 is “my nose is fine.” Sometimes seeing his belief fluctuate by the hour helps the client recognize that he can’t always trust his view of himself.

Cognitive Restructuring

Individuals with BDD have distorted beliefs about their appearance, such as “I have to look perfect,’ or, “If I don’t look good, I’ll be rejected and alone.” Teaching individuals to identify and restructure these distorted beliefs can sometimes help the person gain enough insight to try other bognitive-behaviroal strategies.

Cognitive Distancing

Individuals with BDD have difficulty accepting that they have BDD because that would mean their appearance is okay. One young man who told me session after session that he did not have BDD. What he had was a left ear that was lower than the right ear. He insisted that only plastic surgery would correct the problem.

I commiserated with him and said that plastic surgery was certainly a logical solution to the problem of a true flaw in his appearance but that it was not a solution to BDD. The problem as I saw it was that every time his BDD flared up he bought into the belief that his appearance was flawed. I then taught him a cognitive distancing strategy described by Jeffrey Schwartz in his book titled Brain Lock: Free Yourself from Obsessive-Compulsive Behavior.

Schwartz describes the 4 Rs. I’ll cover the first three here. The first R is “relabel.” The client was taught to relabel any concern, thought, or belief about his appearance as a feature of the BDD, not proof of a physical flaw. He was then to use the second R (reattribute) to attribute every aspect of his experience (his thoughts, feelings, urges, and behaviors) to the BDD. He was then instructed to refocus (3rd R) or distract himself from the BDD thoughts.

An “as if” Attitude

At times I have asked a client to act “as if” he looks okay even if he doesn’t believe it. An “as if” attitude is particularly helpful when trying to get a client to try an exposure exercise that, because of his poor insight, he believes is useless.

I’ve asked clients to use the “as if” attitude to stay at a party when they have a strong urge to leave, to go to social situations when they are inclined to remain home alone, or to stop looking in a mirror when they feel that they must continue. One of my clients used this strategy to go to a party that he wanted to avoid by acting “as if” he was okay and “as if” going to the party would help his BDD and his depression. Once at the party, he was able to use his CB strategies to manage his BDD and that as the evening progressed, he was much less worried about his appearance.

Filed Under: Overcoming Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Treatment of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) Tagged With: BDD, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, CBT, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Depression, Insight

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